


One Last Song

by Sunshinemage



Series: Dirvhenan Worldstate - Random Drabbles [3]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-13
Packaged: 2018-10-04 13:46:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10279865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunshinemage/pseuds/Sunshinemage
Summary: When all is said and done, we keep on moving forward. No matter what. For our own sake, and the sake of those who come after us.- Somewhere in Antiva, 9:52 Dragon -





	

Nindarhmen was sitting on the floor, his knees close to his chest and his head buried in them. Even if he wanted to, he didn’t have the strength to cry, not anymore. It would be useless anyways.

So he sighed. For what felt like the umpteenth time.

He suddenly felt a tug at his sleeve and a hand on his shoulder. Lifting his head, he turned to see Atisha, looking at him with reddened eyes.

 _Atisha_. Their light, their hope, their everything. Oh, how they love their child! She saved them countless of times, when the skies were too dark, when the air was too heavy and when dread would settle in their hearts. Her smile, her laughter, her love made everything bearable. Everything. To think she had to say goodbye to him at such a young age…

“Papa, what will happen after?”

Nindarhmen gently put an arm around her shoulders, letting her head rest on his chest.

“I do not know, _lim'vun_ ” he said quietly. “I do not know who or what will take care of his soul. I am not certain of anything anymore.”

Atisha shifted a bit so she could hug her father.

“No, I meant…”

“I know what you meant, love. What happens to us?”

“What will we do, Papa? What will we do without…”

Nindarhmen held his daughter tight.

“What did he say to you? No details, just… Did he say goodbye?”

Atisha replied with the voice of someone who was trying their best to stay strong and not falter.  

“Yes.” she said, swallowing back a sob.

Nindarhmen and Atisha stayed like this for a while. Nin was gently running a hand through his daughter’s golden curls. Atisha was humming a soft tune, as she always did when she felt afraid.

All those past few months had been a nightmare. Thalon had been in constant pain. He couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t eat. Couldn’t focus on anything, the pain was too unbearable. His state was only worsening by the minute. They knew it would happen, ever since the Exalted Council and the Anchor eating away at Thalon’s arm inch by inch.

They had some years of respite, but the pain was never truly gone. It was borrowed time, and they knew it.

The waiting was the worst part.

They had said all they could on the matter, made all the necessary arrangements, gave closure to every possible issue. All that was left was the waiting.

Not much longer now.

Hanin had gone in the room after Atisha, at Thalon’s request.

Nin was grateful for him. Hanin had always been at their side, never faltering. He always made sure they were all safe. He brought them strength, support, advice and comfort in times of need. And he knew both Atisha and himself would need him in the upcoming days more than ever.

The door opened and Hanin slowly got out of the room.

“Nindarhmen. He doesn’t have long. You should go to him.”

Before getting up, Nin ruffled Atisha’s hair and softly kissed the top of her head.

“Would you stay with her please, Hanin?”

“You needn’t ask.”

 

* * *

 

The room was darker than usual, a single candle next to the bed being the only source of light. It has been quite some time since anyone opened the thick curtains to let the sun shine through.

On his way, Nin lit up little orbs of light, as he always did, their light softer than the one of the sun, which Thalon couldn’t bear anymore. He gently sat on the bed and took his _nas’falon_ ’s hand in his.

“ _Ma’halla._ ”

Thalon’s eyes were bloodshot. He looked exhausted, so weak, so small. Still, at the sight of Nin, a sigh of relief and a tired smile crossed his face.

“Don’t fret, _ma’sylvun_. Save your breath.”

“No breath is wasted when It’s you I am talking to.”

Thalon’s grip on Nin’s hand grew tighter as a flare of pain ran though him. Nin could do little else than watch him and try to soothe him with his warmth, fighting back his urge to scream.

Eventually, Thalon regained enough composure to speak again, the pain all but calmed down.

“I am glad.” he said with the quietest voice Nin had ever heard from him.

“What for?“

“I got to see the sun one last time. Yours is a light even brighter than that, yet it never burns, it never chars.”

Nin smiled in spite of himself.

“The sun is setting right now. I don’t think it will shine as bright again.”

“It has to, _ma’halla_. After all, ‘ _the sun hasn’t disappeared just bec-_ ’

“ _\- just because the clouds are hiding it away from us._ ’ yes, I know. “

"You have to. For Atisha.”

“I know. I will. Darkness will never take her.”

Thalon slowly disentangled his fingers from Nin’s to reach the soft locks of hair and put them gently behind Nin’s ear. A reminiscence of the game of old, when they were all but besotted fools who didn’t know how to act around each other, wondering if each touch would be leading to more.

Several strands of grey were beginning to show among the crimson.

A faint smile found its way on Thalon’s face.

“You’re still the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, _ma'halla_.”

Nin smiles. It hurts, but he still does.

“You always say this. You always say this, yet you’ve never seen yourself when the light of the moon hits you on the rare nights where you’re asleep. You say this, yet you’ve never seen how your eyes shine when you look at our daughter, or the way you smile when you’re combing her hair.”

“I haven’t. But you know I never lie to you.”

Thalon sighed.

“I wish you wouldn’t see me like this. This is not how I want to be remembered by you, or by our daughter.”

“Atisha will remember you by the songs you sang to her when she was scared or sad. She will remember you by the feeling of the wind in her hair when you carried her on your shoulders. She will remember you by all the stories, all you’ve ever told and taught her. And I will remember you by the colour of your eyes. The sound of your voice. The warmth of your smile. The softness of your hand on my cheek. The feeling of your fingers through my hair. I will remember you by the taste of your lips and the way my name fell from them when you said it. We will remember **you**. Not the sickness.“

Nin leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss on Thalon’s forehead.

"You are as beautiful as the day I kissed you for the first time. You are every bit like the man I’ve always known and loved. You are my _falon’saota_. My _nas’falon_.”

Thalon wanted to say something, but his reply died in his throat.

Nin gently rested his head on Thalon’s chest, feeling the erratic beating of his heart and his troubled breathing. Thalon sighed heavily.

“Will you sing to me, _ma’halla_? One last song?”

Nin lifted his head and looked at his _nas’falon_.

They both knew.

Time was up.

Nin swallowed back a sob and smiled, as he always did when he was about to sing him to sleep.

“Trouble sleeping, _ma’sylvun_?”

“A bit.”

Nin carefully settled with Thalon under the fur, sitting against the bedframe. He gently pulled Thalon close to him and let him rest his head on his lap. Nin lazily combed his fingers though Thalon’s hair.

“ _Ar lath ma_ , Thalon. _Bell'anar'is_. ”

“ _Ar lath ma_ , Nindarhmen. _Banal'halam_.”

Nin didn’t trust himself to say anything more. So he did what he did best: he started to sing. Quietly at first. Then Thalon’s hand in his lost its grip, and his song grew louder and heavier.

He sang and sang until he noticed Thalon’s shaking had stopped alongside the slow rhythm of his breathing. His voice then broke into a wail of sorrow.

All the light from the room was gone.

 

* * *

 

Nin’s song, entirely in elvhen, can be loosely translated as such:

>     _My light_  
>     Your plight has ended  
>     Your pain is eased  
>     Your soul can rest
> 
> _My light_  
>     Your day has ended  
>     Lay down your weapons  
>     Lay down your burdens
> 
> _My light_  
>     Your night is falling  
>     Hold my hand  
>     Close your eyes
> 
> _My light  
>     Go safely_
> 
> _Wait for us_

**Author's Note:**

> Thalon Lavellan belongs to [@princeofmorley](http://princeofmorley.tumblr.com) (tumblr)  
> Hanin Lavellan belongs to [@thereluctantinquisitor](http://thereluctantinquisitor.tumblr.com) (tumblr) / [@OctoberSkies](http://archiveofourown.org/users/OctoberSkies) (AO3)  
> Nindarhmen belongs to me (you can find me under the same handle on tumblr)


End file.
